I am a proud UU. These jokes are going to be very funny to anyone who is Unitarian Universalist or who is familiar with Unitarian Universalists. For the rest of you, it will help to know that UU’s LOVE to argue, are very big on social justice, are extremely social, believe in finding your own spiritual path, and have little set dogma.
Here we go:
You may be a Unitarian Universalist if:
* you think socks are too formal for a Summer service.
* you know at least 5 ways to say “Happy holidays!”
* your idea of a guy’s night out is going to a N.O.W. rally.
* unleavened bread is part of your Easter Brunch.
* you refer to construction paper as “paper of color.”
* the name of your church is longer than your arm.
* you find yourself rewriting a church survey, rather than taking it.
* you call up your minister in the middle of the night, panicking because you are starting to believe in God.
* to explain your personal theology, you have to use interpretive dance.
* you take your day planner to church instead of the Bible.
What do you get when you cross a Unitarian Universalist and a Jehovah’s Witness? Someone who knocks on doors for no apparent reason.
Q: Why did the Unitarian-Universalist cross the road?
A: To support the chicken in its search for its own path
(That one came from Pete Seeger.)
For the members of any religion…
To have a few doubts is normal.
To have many doubts is a crisis of faith.
To have constant doubts is a conversion to Unitarian Universalism
It is show-and-tell day at school, and all the children are requested to bring in an item which illustrates their religious beliefs. David stands up and says “This is a star of David and I am a Jew”. Dorothy stands up and says “This is a crucifix and I am a Catholic”. Jimmy stands up and says “This is a coffeepot and I am a Unitarian”.
A UU family moves into a new neighborhood. Their little girl finds a new playmate, and they are happily getting to know each other. One day, the playmate says, “We’re Episcopalians, what are you?” The UU child thinks for a minute and says, “I’m not sure, but I think we’re League of Women Voters.”